LACK of everything

LACK of trust
LACK of love
LACK of time
LACK of money
LACK of care
LACK of confidence
LACK of sleep
LACK of energy
LACK of motivations
LACK of everything.

Let me whine tonight. I'm desperate
All those texts coming a week before I leave,
"When are you going back?" "so fast?!" "we should meet up!"
Seriously, it sounds like you care, but no. I was in KL for 6 weeks. minus a week of for my trips.
So 5 weeks. In KL. no one called. no one cared. i felt pointless. I felt ignored.
2 weeks before leaving for perth, met some cool people.
`Finally had some good outings. But that didn't last long.
Fine, I can't complain. I felt guilty of what happened. Every single shit, my fault, not my fault, I STILL FELT FUCKING GUILTY.

Stayed home four days straight, rolling on my bed from morning till the afternoon, ate brunch, and rolled till night. Tweeted, and slept.
Held my phone, read my friend's tweets, felt useless, slept. I stayed in my room for 20 hours a day. NO JOKE.

2 more days before I leave, MORE TEXTS.
" we should meet up before you leave"
"why didnt you call me?"
"Why leaving so early?"
SERIOUSLY? You all are making me so frustrated. So you all think you guys are VVVVVIP, that might probably means more fucking important than my family? Well, fuck hell no. I organise my time to the best I can, so I don't change my plans, for a person who didn't call for the last five fuckin weeks but 2 days before I leave. Baby, you ain't no Justin Bieber, You ain't no Lady Gaga.

I'm sorry if I offended anyone. I actually admit I'm a little attention seeker. I just seek for that little amount of attention for care from people I've been looking forward to meet. But I guess nothing turned out like what I expected.

Oh well. goodnight.